Facing A Cocoon of Self-Pity (Poem)


Bringing you fame

Let a vowel end your child’s name

Scream once

Crammed with compassion and care

The name carries on from there

What they need is but a generational echo

Transferring a timeline of anguish

Bits and pieces of childhood lego

Building a palace on that road

Best fit, forming the parents’ ego

I carefully stutter, ‘mashalla’


I don’t know what I know.

I am a white trash crow

Or a little red riding hood

Tied in a bow

I was flung

It felt like a bee has carved a wound

When my fragility got stung


Watching comfortably

They seem at ease

A theatre of lonesome nights

Cover me

In a cocoon of self-pity

The making of a clown

So grateful wrathfully

Every moment I seize

Clutching to the remaining dignity

With tiny fingers

Longing to be true

Like sensations in love letters

Translated, a taboo


Bangs of social reflexes

Demanding a ride in a Lexus

To conceal perceptions

Plague dreams for being the odd number

Bold lies highlighting news titles

Causing dreadful depression cycles

Piggy face, a spot light on its nose

Four green eyes

Saying their goodbyes

Folded was I from sensing self-beauty

Wrapped from a slice of truth

From speaking the truth

From being the truth


Breaking feathered conscience

Mortal instructions

Engraved on eternal menus

Never lasting evidence

That the ugly duckling came in one shade

Located at the far end

Always came late

Indeed an outcast has no say

Bright white or black left to fade

Suitable for the destiny of my equation

For I am white

Both skin and heart


They didn’t care who’s left behind

Flip the frame

Egoistic to realize

Who’s lonely on the top?

Chop the tree and I’ll fall on thee

Blow me and my color will be yellow

Lighting the midst of darkness

Or plainly just not your transparent fellow


Where? Overcoming a self

Silencing the ‘Double You’

Please notice me

For I was forever ‘here’

Kissing you goodbye

I was undetected for so long

Finally honest

Freeing myself, won’t seal what I feel

To find a peaceful death

I shall give you every remaining breath

Until I turn blue

Especially For you

Your place is in me

Between a crowd of arms


3 responses »

  1. Did you write this today? I need your interpretations for some parts.. I could only understand some meanings and ideas .. though I felt the overall poem’s vibrations in my soul.. very powerful, literally moving!

  2. I love it dear! mashala didn’t you had such talent!
    keep it up and consider publishing it one day,,,, in another perfect country : P
    take care

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